I’ve gotten behind in my blogging (graduation made me so lazy), but not in my frustration with Death Note. Originally I thought ep 25 would be the only one that sucked so hard. How wrong I was. Not many episodes left and I keep hoping something will change to redeem itself, but I just don’t see that happening. Where once I was bright-eyed and adoring, I have grown cynical and jaded. You did this to me, Death Note! Damn you!

Oh boy, let’s see. In Episode 30, Near admits that he suspects the second L of being Kira, but there’s only a 7% chance. Where do these numbers come from? Nears pull them out of his prepubescent ass. If he doesn’t explain how he reaches his conclusions, there’s an air of genius about them, right? Well, since I’m just dumb viewer I guess I shouldn’t try to understand it. I’m lucky I can tie my own shoes.

The President of the USA comes out and admits he won’t actively fight against Kira. Matsuda comes out and admits that he doesn’t think Kira is all that evil and they yell at him. …Hey, guys - stop yelling at Matsuda!

To make up for all the Light fanservice lately, we also get a shot of the SPK lady in the shower. Necessary? No. Then Mello takes her hostage and just in case we couldn’t put the pieces of this very complicated puzzle together and figure out it was Mello, he starts eating his trademark candy bar. Gee, now I get it!

They go back to SPK headquarters where Near and Mello fight to the DEATH.

Not really, but that would have been ten kinds of awesome.

Instead, blah blah blah, talking, blah blah blah, Kira, blah blah blah, playing with toys, blah blah blah, Mello has a bitch fit, blah blah blah, nobody gets shot. Mello takes back the picture of himself, looking girlish and unscarred. Near throws it at him like it’s some kind of pointy death weapon. I guess this is supposed to to make Near seem more violent, more ominous. Gimma a break.

As Mello leaves, he says “Near,” and Near says, “Mello,” and then they both do their Signature Trademark Moves (eating chocolate and twirling hair, respectively). I threw up in my mouth a little.

Near plays with some Tarot cards, calls up Light, Light has a little internal freakout (surprise, surprise), they circle each other like horny rams and agree on the fake rule, Matsuda needs everything explained to him, the rest of the team grows suspicious. Near offers to kill Mello to test the Death Note, but our heroes just aren’t comfortable with that. Shucks.

I need 50 cc’s of something interesting, STAT!

Instead, the episode flatlines. Light manipulates the president (yawn), and Demegawa rolls in all hyped up on himself and his love for Kira (zzzzzz). The music crescendos, probably to make us think something cool is happening, but it’s a lie.

Back at headquarters, the team sips tea and gossips, while Light listens just outside the door. I’m so bored I’m about to use the Death Note on myself.

And then…MATSUDA! He bursts into the room! Demegawa is on TV! He’s stirring up a mob of angry Kira-worshippers! They’re going to storm Near’s building! They’ll have to run outside! And then Misa will be able to see their names!

OMG WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT?!?!?!?!?!?!

Next time: Light’s plan fails. Shocker.

Posted on Friday, May 18th, 2007 at 2:43 pm in Death Note SUCKS. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.